I'll be 50 on the 18th of March and that feels really big to me. So many changes....
Last December my Mother was not able to come for Christmas because she thought she had the flu...January brought the diagnosis of stage 4 Pancreatic Cancer....May brought passing from this place. October brought the sudden and unexpected break of my ankle....which brought plenty of time on my fanny.
My youngest daughter just finished school and has become a Nurse Practitioner and will leave for Officer Training in the Air Force this coming weekend. My oldest son is now a Boy Scout...no longer a Cub Scout.
I recall the passing of my Father, he was just 61 years old and also passed in 4 short months...went from a strong and lively man to a string bean in 4 months....he was almost unrecognizable to me....
"Life on Lifes Terms" is what tumbles through my mind....."Allow each person the diginity to walk the path of their own lifes" ...a quote from a lecture I'll never forget while I was in college, lingers frequently in the front of my mind.
Thoughts, memories, feelings....all tumbling around my awareness as I pass through each day and all the while....I cling to my needle and thread...it comforts me, guides me and brings me peace as I marvel at all the beautiful fabrics and think of them as representing each one of us....all beautiful, interesting, yet different. Those of us who are quilters are very blessed to have such comfort...something we know, something to do and a community to challenge us, recognize us, encourage us and feed us....something I'll always be so very grateful for.
None of this brings for exuberant blog posts....a deeper melody is being exposed in me....I welcome it and I know many of you are with me in this journey.
This morning I spent some time looking for appropriate images to express some of what this stage of life brings....
A bit of humor never hurts...it's probably darn good for my heart.
Could not pass up this image....I love frogs....but dang...if this represents anything to me it is there is only the end frog and that would probably be this stage of my life....is it the end?
Men in their underware....much more pleasing to my eye than me in my underwear! If this correlates to my life then I honly have two more stages to go. Oh noooooo
Then I thought....none of these seem to reflect how I feel about my life stages....after all, I'm a quilter. If I had more skills with photography and graphic software you'd be looking at an awesome graphic to show my version....however neither of those are the case (yet). Until that time, I'll do my best to show you my version using borrowed pix....
We are cotton seeds that bloom into beautiful cotton buds....
beautiful puffy cotton buds
we are picked by beautiful and loving hands (ok...I know picking cotton makes people's hands bleed...just hang in there with me for a moment longer)
our seeds are separated from our soft fluff and then we are spun into gorgeous strands of many varieties of threads
OR
Now you're talkin'....that is a whole lot of process if I don't say so myself :)
Then we become thread, yarn, or fabric.....all so useful and amazing in their own right
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THEN
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Ahhhh we can be bathed in a rainbow of colors
and are transformed into a endless variety of things...for example
Then we become thread, yarn, or fabric.....all so useful and amazing in their own right
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THEN
Ahhhh we can be bathed in a rainbow of colors
and are transformed into a endless variety of things...for example
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and Aurifil Thread....tons and tons and tons....ecstasy in my mind....
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OR
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Did I just type ecstasy....this is ecstasy to infinity in my world.....
Yes...I wrote this blog post for myself....the experience of writing it and putting it together has lifted my spirits and given me great pleasure....if you have enjoyed any part of it...that is a bonus....because sometimes it is all about me....ROFL. Sorry, I just had to type that.
OR
Did I just type ecstasy....this is ecstasy to infinity in my world.....
Then, join any or all of the varieties of cotton to make quilts and you end up with my version of heaven....and this is what I'm considering to be the life span of a quilter....so much longer and richer than those depicted above....
I'm levitating now....Yes...I wrote this blog post for myself....the experience of writing it and putting it together has lifted my spirits and given me great pleasure....if you have enjoyed any part of it...that is a bonus....because sometimes it is all about me....ROFL. Sorry, I just had to type that.
Hystical laughter fading out into content smiles,
Kelly
I can really relate to this discussion! At 52, I feel like I'm at the peak of my quilting talent - it took me years of practice to get here. But, I also realize that I'll never in this lifetime be able to make all the quilts that are in my head. All I can do is keep smiling and keep making quilts. I'll get as many done as I can!
ReplyDeleteWhat a brilliant post! I love your theory on the life span of a quilter!
ReplyDeleteWonderful post...said the almost 57 year old quilter in the corner.
ReplyDeleteHugs to you my friend.....
ReplyDeleteI love this post!
ReplyDeleteNice post! I'll be turning 50 myself in October...
ReplyDeleteGolly... You'll be 50????? That's old!!!!! LOL
ReplyDeleteI totally get it.
It wasn't until recently that I got a clue on certain things in life. While I still ahve a way to go in solving life's mysteries (or mysteries to me), I'm thankful for the experience and wisdom that are woven into my life so far. It's all about cycles. Part of the order and pattern of the universe.
P.S. I drooled at the thread display! :-)
Some think of turning 50 similar to the intermission of a play. You've enjoyed the first and second acts, time to take a break and come back strong for the 3rd and 4th acts of life. You my friend, get to choose how you play it out.
ReplyDeleteBig hug,
SewCalGal
www.sewcalgal.blogspot.com
I just love that Kelly, sometimes it should be about ME! thanks for such a thoughtful post about you.
ReplyDeleteWouldn't that be amazing, ending up as a spool of Aurifil? Or one of those much loved fabrics. My word, I could reincarnate as a quilt! You may have just started a whole new religion. Make sure there are loads of candles and all the quilters will join you!
ReplyDeleteThank you!
Kelly this post was amazing. We have been through so much of the same but at different times, thanks for the quotes, the friendship and the sharing of your feelings. I am 7 years into 50 and while my body, my crinkles seem to age me, my mind still thinks I am 30+ hopefully it will never catch up!
ReplyDeleteYep.... life does indeed go on! and we find a new filter that we see LIFE through... You need some life affirming time.... and if this weather ever breaks, you will find yourself outside marveling at the newness of spring (daffodils,tulips and new green leaves), the high fun of boys in summer (and mosquitoes) and come fall the vibrant colors of leaves changing and crisp breezes to send them on their way! I am facing the double nickle this year... but me I keep looking forward toward the next adventure... not worrying too much about how many stages I have left. If I did I would be numb with worry....
ReplyDeleteI just started quilting at 62 and I am enjoying this time of my life. I have a job I enjoy, I only have to work 8 hours per day and then I have free time for my new passion quilting.
ReplyDeleteWhat a peaceful and wonderful post, I'm with you, I think it's a good time, evaluation and a slight change in priorities.
ReplyDeleteWe are traveling on the path to becoming. Yet what we will be, we do not know. Just as the bolls of cotton, we may be a functional mop or a lovely fabric or threads, but we each have a place and a purpose. I no longer worry about death - I just keep travelling for now - knowing in the deepness of my spirit that there is another adventure as we pass from this life.
ReplyDeleteWonderful and fun post Kelly and yes some times it has to be all about you! I am facing 60 soon and some of those same feelings as well. I so want to live out may 'later years' as my sweet Mama did hers, with peace and grace. I think I also need to come to terms with the fact I MAY not finish all my projects! hahaha!
ReplyDeleteAt this stage Kelly, your notion is to carry on this wonderful journey we call "life" with smiles and laughter, for that will keep you young at heart! And as we continue along this journey, we must evolve. The universe is having a conversation with all of us...get out there and listen! Aloha
ReplyDeleteI don't even want to think where I am in those stages. There is still so much that needs to be finished.
ReplyDeleteI am so touched & inspired by your post. Thank you & yes, it is sometimes all about you (& the millions of us out there who recognize & are in very similar places)! I enjoyed the humor as well, as I'm not sure we could cope without it. Thanks
ReplyDeleteI love your analogy of cotton. We as quilters certainly can relate. Of course there are days when I feel like the Boll Weevils have infested my life, but hopefully one day, there will be a new crop to extinguish the ravages the weevils have created. Sometimes life gets complicated.
ReplyDeleteI just turned 51 this month. My difficult year was 40. We all reach our difficult year at different times. Rethinking our lives at times can be a very good thing. It helps us to weed out the unnecessary things, and turn towards what we need 'now' instead of what we needed a decade ago. I don't like change, but, this kind of change can be very energizing.
ReplyDeletedon't be afraid of your fifties, they are awesome. i have never felt so alive and have never taken so many naps. it's wonderful to be free to do what i want and be who i want!!
ReplyDeletei enjoyed the cotton analogy!!
Your age is in your head...it's just a number. You are never too old to try something new or go in a new direction. I was in my mid 50's when my first book was published and that started my newest and latest chapter in my life, and I don't see an end in sight. Yes anything can happen and our life can change in an instant...but look beyond that. Live and act as if its your last day, but plan for 50 more years! Love you!
ReplyDeleteOh, yes..a perfect post. Just what I am thinking right about now. Keep on sewing..
ReplyDeleteWow! Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteI so enjoyed this post and I can relate in so many way. 2010-2012 were some pretty rough years for me. Losing people in your life makes you really think about some of the things you wrote about. Life does go on. I just turned 57 this month and I am going to be a grandma for the first time. He will arrive in March. Yes, life does go on and we do what we need to do to rise above it all. I am a believer in Jesus as my Savior. I know He heard the prayers of others and of mine to bring me out of the valley. I pray you have the best year ever. Hugs and Blessings.
ReplyDeleteKelly this was a very beautiful and touching post and at 71 I could relate very well to it. Like you I have been through all the ups and downs of life and now is the time to contemplate them all.when I was experiencing Breast Cancer I was ready to give up on life it was just too hard. But God brought two beautiful grandchildren into my life and now I wanted tol live and so nine years later I am a cancer survivor we mut never give up on life God always brings us beautiful reasons to live. Bless you Kelly for all of your love and strength .Hugs Sandra
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